According to Forbes there are 1.5 billion people suffering from obesity whilst 925 million are undernourished. It makes one wonder on a deeper level what is going on.
It seems that for the 1.5 billion that food has become the enemy and for the 925 million the desired object.
The unhappiness that is covered up by being fat was also hidden, in my case. I was the happy camper of the party. Always joking and out there. For many obese people there are as many differing causes. In my case the less I ate the fatter I got. Now I eat 6 times a day in fact it seems I am eating all day. I do of course exercise,but it was the underlying magnet that had to shift in my case.
I have had the experience of being obese for so long, yet I was in such denial.I remember one doctor calling me obese . I was horrified and refused to see him again. The strange thing was that I had no concept of my size. I could not feel how big I was. If I saw photos they would shock me but usually I only looked at the face .My largest size was 22 / 24. Now I fit into size 12/14 jeans .
I was diabetic and hypertensive but because I could dance and move well I believed I was healthy . even though I was having diabetic slumps all day long, the level of my own deception was mind blowing.
The other noticeable thing was, when I was fat, I was surrounded by friends. A lot of them also fat. Now that I have changed as well as changing country I have far fewer friends. Although I was surrounded by friends I do believe the fat was hiding a loneliness .
And now it really is a case of my head catching up. I have thought fat all my life , now it is time to think and act slim.
I do feel a case of a walking miracle. I am off all medication ,I am no more diabetic or hypertensive.
I feel a new lease on life.
And I also have to say with the weight loss and the loss of a protective covering I am also having to face my own anger issues that had been so well hidden. The fat did serve its purpose . It did cover a lot and hid a lot. Now its the integration time.
In my book Emotional Fat both Amy and I were talking about our hidden "stuff". I think both obesity and anorexia on some levels are very lonely paths. The food becomes the enemy or friend.It becomes the power play. If I am "good" then I ........ fill in the blanks. In my case then my mum would love me.
I also know that I was on a slippery slope of health and Amy also knows her health is extremely fragile. I have recovered. My hope and wish and prayer is that Amy my 26 year old cousin who is facing a life threatening journey with anorexia and bulimia can survive it
For more details of the journey check out the book
www.emotionalfat.com
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